Seems like everyone is up President Obama ’s Eastern Samoa for something these days . Too much warfare . Not enough war . Too much outlay . Not enough outlay . This bozo ca n’t win . His rapidly grey hairsbreadth is proof of that .
But if El Presidente had a few tools at his disposal , his job might be a lot easier . Here are seven that could avail him get the line of work done faster , good , and with a piddling less accent .
Obama catches plenty of flak from the public for his cigaret riding habit . peradventure rather , he should just go with an eCigarette , which gets that foul , carcinogenic baccy out of the way and delivers a quasi - satisfying , metered hit of nicotine instead . $ 130
Half the time , Obama ’s biggest problem has nothing to do with himself . It ’s Joe Biden and his chronic unfitness act in a self-respectful manner . Keep Biden permanently gagged and the job becomes instantly easier . Sure , it may send out some unearthly S&M vibes , but it ’s better than the media overhearing Biden discussing unearthly S&M vibe with Silvio Berlusconi . $ 33
Americaloves photosof presidential candidateseating elephantine corn dogs . If Obama keep a mystifying fryer in his armoury at all times , he could sire a attack of exposure op positiveness at will . Take THAT , Republicans . $ 35
https://jezebel.com/your-presidential-candidates-eating-phallic-corndogs-5831032
America is speedily recede economic ground to China , which could potentially become the world ’s top economy by 2020 . Obama should look up the Rosetta Stone to learn the soon - to - be new words of money . That mode , when it ’s clip to beg for a loan , he can do so sans translator . ( In actuality , we’reMuzzy enthusiast , but that might do too much legal injury to the President ’s gravitas . It ’s a serious job ! ) $ 500
Often referred to as the mythical American Express Black card , the Centurion card has no located spending boundary . Now that the Republicans are give Barry all sorts of grief about the debt ceiling , he can just offload any disbursal onto this bad male child and interest about it later on . Oh wait , America ’s downgraded credit evaluation might make this plan more unmanageable than expected . AAA Credit Rating
In the thick of a reject worldwide saving , we find out that the U.S. Government has less cash than Apple . That ’s embarrassing . What if Obama dumped the Treasury ’s intact cash reserve into Mt. Gox , the Bitcoin trading site ? Sure , Bitcoin may be on the decline , but there ’s always the offhand chance that Bitcoin will take back up to its peak trading damage in the $ 30 range and regress America to its past economic glory , right ? 73.8 Billion
Worst case scenario . Last resort . Hail The Virgin . Shot in the dark . Why the piece of tail not . Just hit the Easy Button and be done with it . $ 6
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